There's been something shifting inside of me, becoming increasingly strange and uncomfortable. I've been out-of-sorts all week, though if I look back I can see the beginnings of this period having started before then, slowly building. I've had phases of my life like this quite regularly. I call it a down-cycle, or sometimes just, "my … Continue reading A Rumble
Category: Diary Entry
Learning to trust my work again
I've talked about and/or vaguely alluded to my job a lot, and how much turmoil it's been giving me. Then I resigned, and now it's just an attempt to survive what remains of my notice period. In the meantime, I've actually started doing some freelance work on the side, and it's shown me just how … Continue reading Learning to trust my work again
Reconnecting (on quantity vs quality)
There's a lot I'm trying to unpack in my life. Emotionally, professionally, spiritually, I've taken quite a few hits these past few years, and fallen into more than one rut. My life's path has been riddled with potholes. That's not to be all "woe is me, I'm so unlucky and everything sucks." On the contrary, … Continue reading Reconnecting (on quantity vs quality)
The Right Moment
I spend so much of my life waiting. Waiting for the right circumstances, waiting for the right people to say/do the right things. Waiting for that "right moment" to do... anything. Especially the things I know will make me happy in the long run. Reading Derek Sivers' book, Hell Yeah or No, I came across … Continue reading The Right Moment
Back to One
It has been four months since my last post. Four months since I even logged onto this blog. How fitting that my last post was about being "Consistently Inconsistent" A lot has happened since then. A lot that swept me away into the currents of daily life - mostly, my job - where I was … Continue reading Back to One
Consistently Inconsistent
I have always struggled with consistency. Well. Not always. As a child I was obsessive about my passions, with seemingly endless reserves of energy, curiosity, and creativity to channel. I was constantly writing poems and short stories, and reading books that I was sometimes too young to even understand. I would be outside everyday, eager … Continue reading Consistently Inconsistent
Clarity (Sort of)
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com I had a really bad day last week. The kind of day that left me feeling angry, and helpless, and sad all at once. It took several days to feel some semblance of normal. I'm still on thin ice. But for all that, it did give me a reality check. … Continue reading Clarity (Sort of)
I’m still alive
Hey, internet. It's been a minute. More accurately, it's been about six weeks. Yikes. I can't speak in too much detail about how these six weeks have gone, partly owing to the fact that it'd give too much away about me and my work, and partly because I honestly don't remember. I think we can … Continue reading I’m still alive
Intentional Insomniac
I have become scared to sleep. Not because of night terrors, or nightmares. Not because of the anxiety dreams that sometimes (though with increasing consistency, now) plague my nights. But because sleep has begun to feel like lost time. Wasted time. Any moment where I am not at work is bliss, and to sleep feels … Continue reading Intentional Insomniac
Small Comfort
Jan 4th, 2013 10:57:21pm I am not a magician, but I know how to make myself disappear. I can vanish. Whenever I want. In broad daylight or in the cover of dark nights. I can go away and never be seen again by those I do not want to be seen by. They will never … Continue reading Small Comfort